Yikes!!!

It's been almost a month since my last post.  I could sit here and detail to you why I haven't posted sooner, but suffice it to say I was very busy and then my computer died.  It's been very revealing for me to see the way I've reacted to all of this.  The busyness and my computer's death.  I really, really, really do not like my life when it is not well organized and that is exactly how I would describe my life over the past month or so.  Very off the cuff, on the fly and very little organization.  Am I a worse person for it?  I don't think that matters very much, but it does show me that I still like to have a whole lot of control over my own life instead of allowing God to have control.  Funny how a guy living in a van, in large part to give control, is still a control freak.  The layers just keep peeling back to see just how sick and twisted I am as a person and how much more I truly need Jesus.  It has been a very encouraging month...as much as I may not like to see my innards displayed to the world because I at times feel like I'm spinning out of control...it has been encouraging nonetheless.  I'm just thankful for God's work in my life and hope I continue to turn to Him instead of trying to control everything.  Continue to turn to Him when this world doesn't make sense.  Continue to turn to Him for leadership when I feel like I have none.